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from awhile ago

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Disney

I sang the American song so loud!  Ha ha ha.  I sounded like Laverne & Shirley once.

Exercised

2 core workouts, 1 for upper

Sick

I feel so sick and need to go for a jog to get my blood circulating, unless I shower and go to bed.

Nourished

I just had a cup of chocolate milk.

New Videos

New Videos of Me Singing

1 - 5/10 - Top of the World
2 - 5/10 - Rainy Days and Mondays
3 - 3/10 - Angel of Music

You know what's what, though..

set up..

My cousins are cared for by younger relatives, and I'm pushed to my gramma when she's mad at me for nothing now.

Jumping to Conclusions

I wouldn't jump and say Sarah Brightman + Richard Carpenter are more real singers than me.  Doing it for popularity and not to showcase talent.

No hard suggestions|feelings, just trying to say something partially braindead from the cold last night.

Just Admit It

Ellen is prejudiced, but she continues to lure me in.  I mean she likes younger young people.  She's just giving me a ball of yarn to play with.

Ah!

I feel dead in the head.

I'm washing my bedding, stuff too wet to iron may wash more laundry.. ehehe

Yesterday

Talked to people from Pennsylvania and Colorado.  The Pennsylvanian lady was right next to me so was very close but felt sorry for her.

What the *beep* is the problem?

I did not make the same decision as my parents as to what I am socially in the world.

Background in Music

Well, supposedly real music you learn more, and it helped me in singing but not when I was kicked out of it.

Well..

..Time for my dad to eat.  :|

Changed My Mind

Guess I'll just do singing and ballet @ UCF.  Wanna get in the dance program ASAP.

I felt uncomfortable about how I figured this out but no need to talk @ it..  I was looking through the sites.  I also tried to call to ask @ what voice majors sing.  Guess they sing the best.  I mean, I dunno what musical theater singing is, too much like rock and pop.

So..

..Musical Theater is built for the performer with multiple talents in a transitory state.  Like, who wanna do things like be in a movie or perform @ Disney..

HEY

The BFA doesn't have as many non-related general studies courses..

@ UCF..

..They say you have a close-knit curriculum not designed for transfers.  What will my mom say @ that??

Upset

At colleges elsewhere we have less general studies if our major is not an Arts degree, like AA or BA..

Case Worker

She just left..

Funny

I'm not getting ads to make more friends in NY.

About My New Major

They perform musicals throughout the years..

Nitey

Guess I will have to deal with myself..  I don't think I will pass through the night.

Real Problems

If you kid @ me taking advantage of things, which I can't, you'll never solve the real problem.

Well

I feel like I'm waiting for something that doesn't matter..

But

I am not a Chinese who looks Chinese nor lives Chinese..  I don't get it if you say that @ me.

So..

..The world hates me cuz I'm Chinese.  Well, you'll have to deal with it yourself.

Problem

I want to be on good terms with my parents and get my needs met.. guess I will do musical theater @ Seminole then UCF or possibly Rollins.

That Group

I'm still getting nonsensical messages, must be warped.

This is unhealthy..

..I am tired of talking to the TV.

Well

Expect a lotta bs from me (ignore my cursing) if I don't get to talk to anyone like a real person in person.

And

I don't want to with them.  That is who they and my brother are how he is, in a highly permanent way.  They can change, but they can't change our relationship now in a snap to be someone else.

I don't know what the big deal is.

My point is my parents don't socialize.  Not in an organized, set up, make sense, fun, orderly, reasoning sorta way..  You know how most moms are like set up in everything in some weird way.  The experience is material..  I'm trapped like some bubble.

Wonerin'

Did you just drop me off life and not stop and know??

It's still @ the kids in school??


Yea, I wanted to move up north and meet people..

So..

I look like my Sleeping Beauty pin..

Problem

Why say I'm irrational like my dad?  I'm a different set of cells..

Well

Ellen follows Bella Thorne on Twitter but of course not me.  We change our Twitters too much, non-famous people I meant.

Problem

I don't want musical theater.. I want something new

I just really

wanna go up north

Considering

a nice musical theater program, but I feel it won't help actually.  I just am not getting accepted.  I am thin enough.

I figured it out-

So, I am not a Baby Boomer and have to be in a college program of lots of other kids who want attention from their parental generations..

Interest

Ellen is not interested in the life I've been provided with.

Don't worry, I turned off what was on the radio..

Question

My parents look very basic and possibly general.  Look at your owns elf, don't pick out my parents to torture in the dead end.

Think @ It

All the commotion is those kids.  There is an unrest all the time.

Even

the radio is not soothing, nothing is!  These stupid kids I gave up my life for!

Did you get what hit me?

I was thinking of how people let everyone else do ^what^ I want.  I don't really interact with my parents, we don't engaged in organized activity, not like putt putt.. I mean in a different way.  Like, they are not organized thinkers..  They seem like they are a different race that I don't want to become.

So..

..Ellen is out to know?  Who wants to be my friend??  I still like her show and all, but I mean lots of people would love to know her!  She doesn't care!  I mean, why Portia??

Well

You seem to have a problem with Portia.  Why does she mean you can't like anyone else??

Scardy Cat

Ellen I don't need no song and dance but I do not approve of Portia in some abstract way no offense if that makes sense.  You do not provide me with what I need before I die.

How many people in Orlando..

..coud provide like Ginny?  People kidin

Unwanted Desires....

You keep making me feel guilty about desires you placed in front of me!

I'm toired

of my dad's secret rantings at me..like I just got the public message from someone I AM NOT FRENCH and like I think I'm high and mighty.  Why wait for my dad?  I used to interact.  This is because not only or if at all by Tim Burton thought it was in a way but essentially no..

Bored

With all my efforts no one could get me into a life in music from college and other talents like ballet.

News

Ellen people want New Orleanians to behave and be more bucked and polished socially..

Hey

Ellen howcome no one else reads and responds to my blogging?

The main point

was that my parents do not ^socialize^ with me.

I just wanted you to know

I always wanted youto sing

I thought you said

being sloppy like this was bad.  I didn't process your logic.  Doesn't have a point.  Says itself.

I found

You are making places other than New Orleans like China, private and unable to function like you.

Hey

Ellen people up north don't get mad at me like you.

Moody

Ellen I am sick and don't know when I will feel ready to view your shows without getting mad and messing things up.

So

I have a love for studying music in a nice school..

I need a good college major.

I want to sing but not just opera.

Before You Even Think About It

I don't plan to have a family now and about the future I set guidelines for different types of fathers..  I'm not getting together, though.  People I like have been too mean to me.

Almost Died

I found I might die if I can't talk to people I want and I don't want anyone I'm related to to find out I want to get close to any other people physically but not s*******.

I was left out in freezing weather in thin pants but a nice jacket, given the wrong pickup time, too..  I was convinced and almost got near death.  I had some coffee with chocolate and sugar.

I also just found Ellen can't provide for me socially, and that's what's killing me.  The people at Disney are so agreeable and free and happy all the time except people were stirring things up and making things impossible I just know it.

I said on Twitter I wish to be in movies but not a star now.  I need money.  I am not provided for.  I would like to see my cousins up north.  They are open to me and know about me.  I don't need famous this and that Ellen and whatever.

There's more, I just forget.

Also, I will not put up with any family members of friends, so plan not to meet.  I was saying I wanted a life like others have.  Oh yes, in the end you have me dead.  I have no money is my problem.  I need to make it.  My aunt doesn't even talk to me much anymore..